attempting

I've been doing ok the past couple days (I think). But that "I think" is the exact reason I needed some sort of blog. Somewhere to keep track of my obsession with food, as well as my thoughts about it. Because not a single soul knows the time I spend obsessing over what i'm going to eat, or not going to eat, or did eat. Hooray for the anonymity of the internet!
So back to the last few days, I think I've been doing OK, except for a few little things. Last night boyfriend and I went to sushi. Which I love because you can just get an order of nagiri style sushi, leave the rice on your plate, and voila! Low fat, nice protein, low calorie restaurant food. But I could resist a few bits of the spicy tuna roll and the gyoza. Super yummy, but defeating the whole purpose of sushi being a low-fat, low-calorie date. Second downfall: this tub of cherry-frosting my friend left on my counter from my birthday party. CHERRY FROSTING. The absolute ONLY kind of frosting I actually like. I've ignored it for about a month, but the night before last I had 2 finger swipes, and last night: 2 (huge) spoon-fuls.
So today after I ate my lunch, I was feeling warm and full, and when I walked into the kitchen to pour the left-over soup down the drain, I saw the frosting. I grabbed it, opened it, ran it under the water, poured salt in it, put the lid back on and threw it away. That felt stupidly good hahaha...

What's weird reading back over this is that it doesn't even sound like me writing. But I guess I don't ever express these particular emotions. Ever. To anyone. So hello there. Hello to a part of myself thats always there, but bound and gagged by the rest of me. Here's the small place you can come out to play. Enjoy.

To keep track...
Breakfast: water = 0 cal
Lunch: half a bowl of Healthy Choice Soup = 100 cal
Snack: 1 slice of cheddar cheese  + 1 banana + 1 granola thin = 280 cal
Dinner (planned): 2 cup Spinach Salad w/balsamic = 150 cal
(plus glasses of water with and in between every moment of eating)

TOTAL = 530

Keeping track is such a good idea, I didn't even realize my "snack" was more than all my meals combined...
Kinda rounding up on the dinner calorie count, cause I'll probably have a nibble of whatever veggies or protein I add to the boyfriend's salad. It's nice that he likes to eat healthy. I remember him and his last girlfriend used to order pizzas all the time. I can probably count on 2 hands the number of times we've ordered pizza in over 2 years...

And we were probably stoned hahaha...